Yet to be Given a Home

A 15-year-old orphan boy desperate for a home exposed the heartbreaking state of adoption in the United States recently when he swallowed his fear and stood before a packed church and begged anyone to adopt him but someone is yet to give him a home.--LEONARDO BLAIR 

The weight of mountains sits on my heart.  Conviction grips me as I realize the state of the church--and of myself.  Jesus asked, "Which of these...proved to be a neighbor?"  I keep rereading this article--a young man yearning for love, reaches out to God's people.  He receives hugs.  He receives encouragement.  But in a church of over 300, "someone is yet to give him a home."

"Lord, when did we see You hungry, and feed You, or thirsty, and give You something to drink?  And when did we see You a stranger, and invite You in, or naked and clothe You?"

"Truly I say to you to the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it to Me."

It is easy to hug, encourage and even to write a check.  And maybe God isn't calling anyone in that church,  to take in a young man such as this. But if He was, can we hear Him? Are we even listening?  Or are we tuned out, worried about our own self, our spaces, our jobs, our time, or anything else that drowns out God calling us?  Are we convinced we are not in the right place, right time, right circumstances?

God told Noah to build an ark in the desert--not seeming to be the right place, time, or circumstances.  But we know the story.  What if Noah said he would build it once he finished the addition on his house, and his wife was done with school and he had adequate savings?

I weep for this young man.  I weep for the state of the Church of today.   And I weep as I realize that I too am guilty of gladly serving from a comfortable distance, while being too busy for the involvement Christ is talking about. God forgive me!  Lord, I pray I hear You above the "noise" of this life, see those you wish for me to serve and be willing to overlook my perceptions of the right place, time, and circumstances, and answer when You call!

I pray Davion's prayer is answered.

Waiting

"I will lift up my soul to you, LORD.

2I trust in you, my God,

do not let me be ashamed;

do not let my enemies triumph over me.

3Indeed, no one who waits on you will be ashamed,

but those who offend for no reason will be put to shame.

4Cause me to understand your ways, LORD;

teach me your paths.

5Guide me in your truth and teach me;

for you are the God who delivers me.

All day long I have waited for you.

6Remember, LORD, your tender mercies and your gracious love;

               indeed, they are eternal!" 

There is so much going on these days that I find it extra comforting that God is in control.  As I wrestle in prayer and petition the Lord over certain things, I have to keep reminding myself that the Lord's timing is always perfect...and its never mine.  So, I will wait on the Lord, because I trust Him.  As I wait, I pray He will teach me and guide me.  I know the Lord will provide.  His mercies and love are forever.

Make the Best Use of My Time

So, then, be careful how you live. Do not be unwise but wise, making the best use of your time because the times are evil. Therefore, do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is. -Eph 5:15-17

With so much to do it seems impossible to make the best use of your time.  My down time, like tv, surfing the internet, video games, etc. can take up an awful lot of time without our realizing it.  I'm not saying some down time isn't necessary.  But I always need to ask myself, am I spending more time goofing off than I am on focusing on the Lord?  One look at the headlines, and it reads like something contrived decades ago-so sensational it makes no sense.  But the days are evil.  And now, more than ever, it is so important to focus on things of the Lord.  If I want to know the Lord's will, I mustn't be foolish.

Here's to Stepping Out.

"Sometime our lack of faith is uncovered by a delayed answer.  God keeps us waiting, and our faith, which ought to be strengthened by this testing, begins to fade and wither.  Either we give up praying all together or we pray on without any real confidence.  At other times we continue steadfastly in prayer, despite the waiting time, until something happens which seems to knock the bottom out of our hopes.  Casting away our confidence, we conclude too readily that we must have been mistaken, and so the debris of another unanswered prayer is swept into the rubbish bin of 'Couldn't have been the will of God'.  This is not God's way."--Arthur Wallis

Over the years I have had regular prayers for certain people and have seen nothing happening but the worsening of situations.  Recently I have had some fervent prayers that seem to fall flat, going nowhere.  In reading "Pray in the Spirit" by Arthur Wallis, I am encouraged once again.  Having faith is easy, keeping faith is hard.  Faith can vacillate with our circumstances due to our human nature.  It is only through the Spirit that we can obtain victory.  I will continue in my repeated prayers knowing that God hears, and that I must not only have faith, but believe.  I have faith that rope bridge over the deep chasm will hold me.  But do I believe enough to take the first trek across?  Here's to stepping out.

The Black Belt Attitude of a Believer in Christ

What an exciting day!  After much preparation Jace got his black belt.  The preparation was taxing not only Jace, but on me.  I spent a lot of time drilling him, helping him study and prompting him on his forms.  It made me think of how often the Lord must spend reviewing and going over things with me!!!  At the ceremony, Master Daniel made a point of telling the class that with a black belt comes a new responsibility- and not just for themselves because they have achieved a new level. He explained that as they achieve and succeed they represent the effort and skill of their Master, their parents, and their teachers, therefore their successes are also those of the Master, parents and teachers; however, so are their failures. Therefore, as Black Belts they have more responsibility to ensure they emulate a favorable representation.  I thought that was such a powerful point and lesson not only for the kids but the parents and the believer as well.  The Bible is clear that God gives us our skills, knowledge, and abilities.  When we do as God says, we reflect our Heavenly Master to those around us.  And again, when we fall short, we reflect that as well.  While God is gracious in redeeming my (and everyone’s) many mistakes, I still should do my best to represent my Master.   A Black Belt attitude in my walk with Christ!

Why Am I in This Place Where I Can't Be Effective?

Today I realized I need a change in perspective.  All along at work I was thinking my ministry was to accomplish something, to do a good job, to reveal problems and set about fixing them.  But after several years of trying to no avail, I’ve taken something Chuck Missler said to heart  (funny, because this has been the running theme of the week.  It started with a prominent teacher saying that God isn’t in control of everything, with which I vehemently disagree.)  He asks, Do I trust that God is in control of everything? So I set to pondering this…do I trust God to be in control?  Yes I do.  God knows that the problems at work will likely never get resolved, let alone correctly-the leadership structure and culture are pervasive.  So, if I’m not there to “fix” anything, why am I there?  At a meeting this morning it hit me…..I suppose it’s kind of like a hurting person or a sick patient.  You can’t fix their problems, but you can sit with them, serve them, minister to them, encourage them, and most importantly pray for them.   Likewise, I can’t fix the problems at work-only God can arrange that-so getting upset or frustrated certainly won’t help.  But I can listen and offer my service 150%.  I can encourage those around me to keep working and doing their best despite the low chance of seeing things execute-work for the Lord, not man.  I can pray--pray for those around me, those in leadership, my projects, resolution to problems, and for the many, many people who are hurting behind the careerist façade.  Maybe that is why God has me in this place.

Son was Shining

Talk about hot!  It was brutal today outside.  Thankfully, my office was nice and cool, my car was cool, and my house is cool.  Praise the Lord for AC!  I had a conference today on the results of aptitude testing I had done two weeks ago.  It was really interesting, very insightful.  It seems I have great aptitude to be a lawyer!  Its kinda funny--when I was a kid I wanted to be a lawyer.   I'd also make a great detective or research analyst.  It seems I score very high in problem solving and have the ability to perform inductive and deductive problem solving.  As I think about these results, I am extremely amazed.  I was listening to a podcast on the way over about the complexity of DNA.  If DNA is complex, how much more so are we? I scored high in many other areas, like art, music, etc. and seemed suited for some really career choices.  I am amazed at how God wires us!  On another note, after my conference I chatted with the advisor, and ended up staying an extra 45 minutes talking about God, Hebrew Roots, shared several resources with this lovely Christian woman.  The Son was shining today!  ;>)

BUSY

It really is hard to keep on track.  As I ponder my day, and lament over all that I did not get done, I am forced to evaluate how I use my time and how I prioritize.  Don't get me wrong....I'm pretty good at time management.  I tend to get a pretty good bang for my buck outta the time I have.  Still, there is always room for improvement.  I imagine God feels kind of like I do when I take my son to Wal Mart or Target...I have something I need to get, but my son gets sidetracked by all the things he sees, he wants, and HAS to have, touch or play with. Look at this book, isn't this toy cool?  Wow!  I really like this bubble bath.  Wait a second, I want to see what kind of cookies these are.  I get home, cook dinner, clean up after dinner.  Sit down with my computer to make a quick purchase.  But what happened on Facebook today?  hmmm....are those earrings on sale?  Let me just send a quick email.....etc.  BUSY--Burdened under Satan's yoke.  Chuck Missler once made a comment about the eyes being the window to Satan, the ears the window to God.  We see the world and want things.  We need to listen and obey.  As I finish this, its no more facebook tonight.  Its time to pray!

Looking to my future

So, today I informed my management that by 1 May I would like to be in a new position on 32 hours.  I gave them my "wish list" and let them know I would be aiming to meet that.  It seems they are excited that I gave them a heads up, and want to see what opportunities are a fit for me.  Honestly, I think I'm burning out where I'm at.  Years of recommended good changes are lost on an inept government.  I think we all see that on a daily basis, but I get to live it.  So, I'm praying.  I told God I don't want to be living for my weekend.  I want to live each day, whether I'm in my office or home, out or about.  It will be interesting to see where he takes me. 

So caught up...

Its amazing how easily I get caught up in the day to day things of life....Kid not listening, clothes to put away, not sleeping well, hurry to work, hurry--well, crawl with the traffic--home.  So and so annoyed me, I said something I shouldn't have, I feel bad, I feel good.  I hope most people can relate and I'm not alone in this mode of getting caught up.  So what's the solution?  I think about Paul.  A man with a mission.  He travelled for the purpose of preaching the gospel.  But he was also a tent maker.  Did he fret because he had three orders of tents due by Friday?  Did he get frustrated with a customer who said his stitches weren't small enough?  Did he yell when a camel cut him off in the road?  I don't know, and of course, the scripture doesn't say.  I'm sure he had his days to, after all, he was a man.  How did he deal with it?  I admit, sometimes it is hard for me to keep my eye on the prize, to run the race to win.  I get tired and frustrated.  Yet, still, I trust that with each passing day, it is precious if I learn of and yearn for the things of God more.  If I understand a nuance I hadn't before, or if I see an inkling of him at work.  Today, my heart broke for someone diagnosed with illness, for a co-worker's autistic son, at the blatant disregard for God by so many, and at my own pride and sin.  Today my heart rejoiced to hear my son speak of angel's and hearing God's voice, to listen to life in a way only a child can explain, to see a meal cooked by my mom and the comfort of my husband knowing regardless, he loves me anyways.  An inkling....I long for more, but I suppose Rome wasn't built in a day?

In spite of bureacracy...

Since Snowmageddon, I have been struggling to get things back on track.  I had a full 10 days of loafing.  One would think that would be enjoyable, and it was for a while.  But soon, I wanted to get back to some sort of routine.  God wired us to be productive.  What that means for me may be different for others.  But I know God wired my to work and produce results.  So imagine my frustration as I sit in my office day in and day out working to get things done, only to take a step backward instead of forward!  The government bureaucracy and inability to accomplish the simplest of tasks is astounding, and it has progressively worsened over the last 5 yrs.  I have been praying on this a lot lately.  I guess I was hoping for the sea of bureaucracy to part and allow things to pass thru to fruition.  Instead, it has been more of the same.  Still, today, for the first time in a while, instead of questioning why I was there, I found myself just content to do the best I can do.  I like to think of Daniel, and Joseph.  How did they manage their frustration?  Daniel had to serve a pagan king, while Joseph was enslaved to pagans.  I'm sure both gave counsel that was ignored at one point or another.  I'm sure in that situation, it definitely felt like backwards progress.  But they remained faithful.  And that is what I pray for.

Everything I Need

I've been meaning to write on this blog. In fact, I've written several things, but nothing I've written has been sufficient for me. But I want to at least make the habit of writing. So, until otherwise done, I'll post Bible verses and songs with a (possible) explanation at the end. Here's my first one...

When every step is so hard to take - all of my hope is fading away - when life is a mountain that I can not climb You carry me, Jesus carry me. You are strength in my weakness - the refuge I seek. You are everything in my time of need. You are everything I need. When every moment is more than I can take and all of my strength is slipping away; When every breath gets harder to breathe, You carry me, Jesus carry me. You Are strength in my weakness, You are the refuge I seek, You are everything in my time of need, You are everything I need. I need You - You are everything I need; I love everything about You, cause You are strength in my weakness; the refuge I seek. You are everything in my time of need. You are everything, You are everything I need!
hag 1:5-9 And then a little later, GOD-of-the-Angel-Armies spoke out again: "Take a good, hard look at your life. Think it over. You have spent a lot of money, but you haven't much to show for it. You keep filling your plates, but you never get filled up. You keep drinking and drinking and drinking, but you're always thirsty. You put on layer after layer of clothes, but you can't get warm. And the people who work for you, what are they getting out of it? Not much-- a leaky, rusted-out bucket, that's what. That's why GOD-of-the-Angel-Armies said: "Take a good, hard look at your life. Think it over." Then GOD said: "Here's what I want you to do: Climb into the hills and cut some timber. Bring it down and rebuild the Temple. Do it just for me. Honor me. You've had great ambitions for yourselves, but nothing has come of it. The little you have brought to my Temple I've blown away--there was nothing to it. "And why?" (This is a Message from GOD-of-the-Angel-Armies, remember.) "Because while you've run around, caught up with taking care of your own houses, my Home is in ruins."

Often times in our lives, we come upon a moment that is too much for us to bear. A child facing a deadly disease, decisions as to what college to go to or what move we should take to advance our career, who to marry, etc. All of them summed up in the question, "What now?" In America, we constantly run after success. Usually, we find it in one form or another, but what do we have to show for it? I know those who are the most righteous people I've met who've lost children. Others did all they could to save their buddies in war, only to see them get torn in two at the most desperate hour. The Jews in the verses above had reestablished themselves in Jerusalem and made quite a name for themselves, but they just couldn't figure out that next step to success. Instead of constantly finding a solution to our problems, let's take comfort in the Lord's sanctuary. Build a moment of your time every day to worship him in his prescence. Then we'll be full, then we'll find meaning. He's everything we need. Our future rests in him. Our children rest in him. Our fight rests in him. Our loves rest in him. And the key word here is rest. If every aspect of our life, from the mundane (like our careers) to the important (our families and friends) rest in the hands of God, why can't we?

Psa 55:22 Pile your troubles on GOD's shoulders-- he'll carry your load, he'll help you out. He'll never let good people topple into ruin.

Owning Climate Change

I'm amazed at God's sense of humor.  After our climate conscious president talks about the validity of "climate change", God sends a week of snow to DC.  God is so cool like that.  I'm so glad, too.  After spending the day dealing with sneaky businessmen and their politics, the giggle is much needed.  Its also reaffirming.   God is in control.  No policy, no state of the union speech, no president's charm or attempt at wit, no bowing, no selling carbon credits--nothing--can wrest control away from my God most high.  As I ponder my day and thank the Lord for His grace over my ingratitude, I am in awe that He cares about all things...including people trying to claim control over His climate!

On an entirely different note, a lovely woman from work has been diagnosed with breast cancer, surgery tomorrow I just found out.  Prayers requested for her. 

Bring on the Reeses!

It was a Fast day today, when I skip breakfast and lunch in favor of a couple of nuts (to keep away nausea from meds) and V-8s, and focus on specific petitions and my love for God.  It was ALSO Muffin Monday, the first Monday of every month when I bring Costco muffins into the office.  By the end of the day the muffins were mostly gone except for about 2 and 1/2.  I gathered them up and put them in a bag to take home.  I sat it on my desk.  In front of me.  It smelled realllllly good.  Thankfully, I had made a cheat post-it on James 1.  "Temptation--->my lust"; short for "But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust."  James 1:14.  In the Greek interlinear, the word is desire.  Still, you get the idea.  As silly as it may sound, that "Temptation--->lust" staring at me on a flourescent green post it is just what I needed.  Isn't it silly?  I knew I was fasting, yet here I was drooling and thinking of finishing my fast early to dive into the muffins.  I had predetermined to keep my fast until I got home--but it wouldn't be that bad, would it?  The only thing keeping me from eating those muffins wasn't my will of steel, but my scribble of scripture on a post it.  So, does God view these silly little things as insignificant?  Luke 16:10 says “One who is faithful in a very little is also faithful in much..."  Well!  Bring on the Reeses!

Praying for Las Cruces Saints

Its amazing how a conversation can be so uplifting.  I chatted with my friend I call "brother bear" (Ken) that I haven't talked to in a while.  I've know brother bear now 12 years.  Not only was he very encouraging, but he told me that things in the spiritual realm are shaking up where he lives, too!  God is definitely moving, and it is so nice to know that thousands of miles away I have a friend thinking of me and praying for me.  So tonight, I am lifting up the Las Cruces saints, that the Lord will hear their cries as they suffer loss of jobs, illnesses, tradgedies, etc.  I especially pray for brother bear's wife, mama bear (Pat) who has been battling cancer.  The both of them have been such an inspiration and font of strength and encouragement to all who know them.  I hope my prayers result in encouragement for them as well.

testing

Testing ...

Loving Like God

Throughout my day, I tried to keep my focus on God.  Its hard at work sometimes, when problems are so big they seem unsolvable.  Dealing with the drudgery I have to take some creative measures to keep my perspective...listening to sermon podcasts as background noise, prayers in the bathroom--the only place with remotely any privacy, and a glance at scripture or Oswald Chambers during the day.  Sometimes, I even prayer walk down and up 4 flights of stairs!  So I am very thankful that God gives me a reminder that he is still there, involved, and loving me.  My son decided last night that we needed to have a pajama party tonight.  Then, 10 minutes later, he sadly announced that we had to cancel because he had Tae Kwon Do, and there wouldn't be enough time.  6 years old, and he's feeling the weight of drudgery!  Well, I ate dinner while he was gone, knowing that he had eaten earlier before he left.  By the time he got home, I had picked out a short DVD, made dessert, and was showered and in my jammies.  PAJAMA PARTY!  We hopped in my bed and giggled as we watched Curious George and ate dessert.  He was pretty pleased with our pajama party, and I was very blessed just to have the time with him.  Unlike God, I can't be with him in his "drudgery" all the time.  But I can be like God and give my son reminders that I'm still here, involved, and loving him.

I'm No Daniel or Joseph

I often wonder how Daniel felt surrounded by ungodly people in his day-to-day work.  The same with Joseph.  Both men had day jobs, and it was in the midst of and in service to ungodly people.  How did they deal with the frutration of frivolous royalty making decisions for their whims and not for Truth?  I'm sure their bosses had their share of consultants, and that there was immense politicking between them.  We know that Daniel's peers were jealous and tried to have him killed!  Some days I wonder why God has placed me in my workplace.  Did Daniel ever wonder?  Did Joseph?  If they did, we have no evidence of it.  Both men were credited as remaining righteous.  As I ponder my day, I am grieved that I am not like Daniel or Joseph in every instance that the opportunity arises.  I find it way to easy to get beat down by the lack of real productivity and wise decisions due to personalities and politics.  So, what can I do?  I suppose I should do what Daniel and Joseph did.  Settle down, and continue to pray and seek the Lord.  Who knows?  Maybe I'll be credited in history as remaining righteous? 

Time Management

God wants our heart.  All of it.  If he wants my heart, I am assuming he also wants my time.  Everyone understands that it is hard to have a relationship if you don't put in the time to get to know each other.  Likewise, it is hard to hear, hard to learn if we don't put in the time.  For some reason, I decided that instead of killing time by doing silly things on my computer--facebook, games, poking around--that maybe I could use that "free time"  to spend with God.  Read his word, get in some studying amidst the hectic pace of my household, and remove the excuse that I don't have time.  Well, I have been doing that to some degree.  I've read some Christian fiction that really adds the human element I strain to understand.  I've studied on Joel.  I've read some Genesis, and listened to podcasts while doing tasks like bills or my nails instead of watching tv.  You know what?  I had no idea how much time I can spend learning at the feet of my Lord!  Now, I'm not saying I don't poke on facebook, or check out news sites, and sometimes kill time. I do.  I'm sure we all need our own form of down-time.  The point is that if I really do desire to know Him, then more of my time should focus on Him.  If I'm spending hours playing a game, or hours reading the news, and then wonder why I'm still a babe in Christ, or still don't understand something, know the Lord better, or whatever--the answer is right there in front of me.  Why not use my time in a God-seeking way?  I have, and have been so blessed by it!

Made in God's image

Tonight as I watch my son make another very creative picture, I am marvelling at how God put a piece of himself in us mere humans.  We are made in His image.  Today in Sunday School we learned that only God can truly "create", make something out of nothing.  But we can make some very creative things.  God created us.  As we are flawed creatures, it amazes me how His image can shine through us.  Some are shinier in other areas.  Some may shine more mercy, others may shine more authority.  What is cool is that each of us, though imperfect, reflect different aspects of the Father, and collectively gives us a glimpse of the image were modeled after.  As my son sits here working on the next Lego masterpiece, I marvel at one of God's 6 yr old masterpieces as he selects the next brick.